01

My attitude toward adding people on WeChat has gone through three stages.

The first stage was a few months after I started writing. I began wanting to connect with people outside my bubble. Back then, I wasn't very proactive — I rarely reached out to others, but if someone wanted to add me, I mostly said yes.

I hadn't thought too deeply about it. I just felt it was nice that someone wanted to reach out.

02

Then in 2023, as I got more into side projects, I heard some content creators say that your private network is your real asset — that followers only truly count when they're in your WeChat contacts.

I believed it for a while and started being a bit more enthusiastic about it.

But gradually, I noticed that most people who added me either wanted a follow-for-follow, wanted to chat aimlessly, or were just looking for freebies.

The ones who actually had meaningful conversations? Very few.

During that period, I started feeling resistant. Adding people on WeChat seemed pointless. Eventually, I just closed myself off.

03

Then yesterday, someone messaged asking to add me. I reflexively said no, but then I paused and asked myself — am I really going to reject everyone forever?

What is the real nature of adding someone on WeChat? It's simply another way for someone to get to know me and build trust.

That's it.

Someone reads my writing, feels it resonates, and wants to get to know the person behind the words. Adding on WeChat — totally normal.

A developer has been following my work for a while and wants to see what I'm up to day-to-day. Adding on WeChat to check out my Moments feed — totally normal.

Trust isn't built all at once. It's built by getting a little closer, one step at a time.

WeChat is just one of those steps.

Once I understood this, there was nothing to resist anymore.

Looking back, what I was really resisting wasn't adding people — it was the feeling of being drained after connecting. And now I see clearly why I kept attracting draining relationships: because I used to want something from everyone.

Last year, after going through some rough patches, I saw my own sense of scarcity. I wanted to break free from it. So I started learning CBT therapy, began writing consistently, exercising, and gradually went through a series of inner shifts.

Now my mental energy is stronger. I can handle more on my own. I no longer expect things from others. So naturally, it all became clear — not everyone who adds me needs to be on the same wavelength, and not every conversation needs to be a two-way street.

Some people add me, quietly observe, and one day when they need something, they think of me. That's fine.

Some people add me, realize we're not on the same path, and that's that. Nothing wrong with it.

Connection doesn't need to lead somewhere every single time, does it? That's how I see relationships now.

Final Thoughts

So now, I'm open to it.

Just to be clear upfront: adding me on WeChat won't get you spammed with ads or pulled into some course-selling group.

If you'd like to connect, you're welcome.

On this indie dev journey, let's get to know a fellow builder who's honest and serious about the work.

novNuyoah